PPP101: Encouragement for Piano Parents with Cortney Toumayan

16Jul 2018 by Shelly Davis

PPP101: Encouragement for Piano Parents with Cortney Toumayan

Listen to the full episode here

Cortney's personal piano story

When Cortney was three years old, she discovered her love of music through a popular musical – “The Phantom of the Opera”. As she listened to the music over and over, she eventually began to pick out the melody on the piano and her parents decided to try out piano lessons. Over the years, Cortney learned from four different music teachers. She began to seriously consider music as a career when she was 16. However, after being told that music wouldn’t be as sustainable, Cortney went into the dental field for a few years before quickly returning to her first love – music.

For many, there is a mindset that music is just a side business, a way for stay-at-home moms to earn some extra money. But music is important! Cortney realized, just as lawyers and doctors had someone to teach them and guide them in their profession, the same goes for musicians; “Music is language and math and communication and emotion… wrapped up in one…and you have to have someone to guide and nurture [that].” And so for piano parents, if your child seems to be particularly interested in music, don’t discourage that. There are so many outlets they can be music teachers in private studios or colleges or they could be band directors. In an interview with Lisa Donovan Lukas, she talked about in her early days, she lived in Los Angeles and worked with and edited film scores. There are so many more options in the music field than a lot of people realize.

What is your personal teaching style?

“I think as far as teaching style, it varies from student to student. When I was first beginning to gather students, I had the idea that everyone should be taught the same. Everyone was in the same method book. Everyone had an expected amount of time to learn their pieces. We did the same type of games, so everyone was kind of on the same schedule and I had a high turnover rate and students would last a year and a half. And so that was hard. I kept thinking, what am I doing wrong? And I finally had this epiphany of which I should have had at the beginning really of my career, people weren’t the same. Students aren’t the same. They all learn differently and I started changing my style. And so now I individualize. For example, let’s say that I’ve got a very hyperactive child. It may not be the best technique, but if we’re having a day where we just cannot sit still on the bench, we’re going to take the bench away and we’re going to let him stand up while he plays with songs. And so I think it greatly depends on the student and what their desires are and how you teach them and really taking the first three or four weeks to get to know that child and, and look for those little signs. How do they learn?”

What is a common struggle you see in your studio?

“I think a lot of times in the lessons, kids will play the way that they think you want them to play, but it’s not the way that they’re playing at home. Lessons and home practices really mesh and whatever is happening at home is going to directly affect what goes on in piano lessons. It’s not really two different things. And so if, if students have that mindset of, well, I’ve got to do it exactly like the way Ms. Courtney wants me to do it and here and then I’ll just do it the way that I want to at home. And they’re becoming dissatisfied with this back and forth struggle and the teacher doesn’t know. You can get burned out really doing something that you’re exasperated with, and kids are no different. And that kind of comes back a little bit to the communication and the changing of teachers, because I know that I’ve had several students in the past that they didn’t really want to continue with it piano and that’s fine, but sometimes kids will stay in lessons for months and months on end and you find that they’re beginning to struggle. And the reason that they haven’t quit yet is because they love their teacher and they don’t want to give up that relationship. And that is, that’s so heartwarming, but if you continue to sit in that cycle of frustration and the communication isn’t there, it can really hurt the child’s musicianship later down the road. They may become so frustrated that they never pick up another instrument again. So that communication is so vital.”

What keeps you motivated as a teacher?

“I think the top thing for me is just looking at a student and it doesn’t matter what their age. It could be a four year old or it could be a 74 year old and when they accomplish that thing that they thought they were never going to be able to pass and you see their eyes light up. I mean you could have had the most horrendous teaching day and you get that one student at the end of the day and it makes that all worth it because you know where they’re at. You remember that moment when you had that same “Aha” moment as a student yourself and it just so good to watch other people come to that themselves. It just gives me goosebumps.”

If you could visit with a composer, who would it be?

“Probably Chopin, really for no other reason except his music is just, it’s so intriguing. I love listening to Chopin, his music is just amazing and it has so much depth to it. There’s just so many emotions that go through it. I would probably want to meet him just to see what he looked like, what was going through his mind, you know, does his personality spillover into his music. I think that would be incredible.

The second one would be John Williams. I mean, everything that I’d ever heard written by John Williams is just so inspiring and it really touches you. There’s a lot of movies out there that I actually walk away from and go, oh, that could have been so great if the music was better. Maybe that’s just coming from a music teacher’s perspective, but music can make such a huge difference in whatever you’re watching, you know, and everything that he writes just touches your emotions in the right way for whatever scene that might be. So he’s just a genius.”

Words of encouragement

“Thank you so much for investing in your child’s future with music, and that might sound cliche, but really coming from a music teacher, there’s so much that goes into this that you can’t even imagine the outcome if your child sticks with music and how it really affects everything else in their life as well. It’s a big undertaking and I would just encourage every single one of you to keep at it and just be encouraging, and stay in contact with your teacher so that they know what’s happening, what’s going on so that they can help your child get through those struggles. Then just enjoy your child’s learning process and all of the sour notes and all of the mistakes. Watch them grow as a musician because in no time at all. They’re going to be playing things that just blow your mind, so just enjoy every step of the way.”